this is not an exciting blog. i don’t go anywhere. i don’t do anything. right now, i don’t have a job. i’m also not in school. i don’t have any friends to gossip about, and there’s not a lot to say about my family, either. i don’t have kids, and i’m not inclined to blog too much about my pets. i can (and sometimes do) talk about world events. but what can i say that hasn’t already been said a million times by people that can express themselves better than i can? and who cares what i think, anyway?
so why the hell do i have a blog? well it sure as hell isn’t here to entertain anyone. the main purpose of this place is to allow me to puke my thoughts out somewhere so they won’t drive me completely crazy. it doesn’t have to make sense to anyone else. i don’t want a huge audience. i don’t want to have to think or worry too much when i write here. it’s my little niche. it’s my shrine to myself. and it’s on the internet for all to read because i can do more with html than i could ever do on paper. most of what i write is open to the public because it’s my passive-aggressive way of expressing myself without having to talk to anyone. if you don’t want to know how i’m feeling or what i’m thinking about, don’t bother visiting my blog. it’s not here to make you feel good or anything. it’s not here for you at all. i appreciate anyone who reads this regularly, most of all because they don’t tell me what to write or how to feel. and if you ever get the urge to do that, my blog is not the place for you. i update when i feel like it, and i’m not going to just pull an entry out of my ass because you’re bored or because you think i owe you one. sometimes i not only don’t feel like talking to anyone, but don’t feel like being expressive at all.
sometimes, like now, i’m living out my secret life, like walter mitty, in my mind. and i don’t feel like sharing my fantasy world with anyone else. like a dream, when you share it with others, it begins to disappear. so i’m living in my head right now, and am not likely to write entries very often. but i also refuse to do what seems so popular among bloggers and go on hiatus. i think that’s silly, and if a blogger does that too many times, i tend to take them off my list. it would be pretty stupid to make a big production out of not posting entries, then come back and post the next day because i happen to feel like it. so i guess i’m not going to give the common courtesy of warning people that i don’t intend to post, either.
but to the readers that don’t expect much out of me, and continue to read this year after year, thank you. you can probably expect more of the same.
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