on saturday, i drove us up to tallahassee to look for a house, for what i thought would be the final time. i (stupidly) had a good feeling about the day, and toward the end of our adventure, i found a house i loved. it was the only house i had seen in all this time that i really felt good about. it was the only one that i felt was worth the asking price. the way i felt about this house was the way i felt when i first saw our current house. complete and total adoration would be an understatement. so we stopped by the last house on the list, which was nice, but didn’t compare to the one we’d just seen, so we went back to the realtor’s office to write up an offer. our realtor had been trying to reach the selling realtor since we’d been at the dream house, and hadn’t had any luck, so she said she’d call us when she heard back. and so i got back in the car and we began our five hour journey back home. (i did a lot of driving that day.) and we didn’t hear back from her. i was trying not to get too excited, because we haven’t had much luck with this so far. every place we’ve wanted goes under contract the day we look at it. but it had been more frustrating than disappointing because i hadn’t really loved those houses. they just seemed like a decent place to live out the next three years of my life. besides, this house had been on the market for about four months, unlike the other places which averaged a couple of days, so there was maybe some hope, right?

so on sunday, we were catching up with our dvr-ed world cup games, and by 2:00 i was going crazy wondering what the hell was going on with our offer. sohei called our realtor and she said she’d just been on the phone with the selling realtor and was about to call us.

i’m sure everyone can guess what happens next.

so she says that there was already an offer, and the seller didn’t even want to look at ours. the selling realtor tried to get her to at least see it, because the other offer was so bad. but, no. the stupid, irrational bitch just wanted to sell her house and didn’t care what our offer was. even though i wanted that house so fucking badly that i was willing to pay $10,000 over the asking price if i had to (our initial bid was the asking price of $150k). i would have done anything to have that house. i would have paid closing costs. i would have fixed any problems the inspection turned up. and now someone who wasn’t even willing to pay the asking price is going to get it because the seller is a fucking moron. and i have to decide whether i even want to deal with this anymore. right now, no, i don’t. we’ll know by wednesday if the sale falls through, and if it does, we’ll be putting in our offer. but it’s very unlikely for that sort of thing to happen, since anyone can get financing these days.

i’m not doing this anymore. i’m tired of the stress and expense. (these trips to tallahassee ain’t cheap.) i’m sick of being rushed to make such a big decision. and i’m damn sure sick and tired of dealing with these idiot sellers that seem completely incapable of rational thought. unless, by some miracle, we get this house, i’m giving up. we’re just going to rent something. maybe we’ll buy later, maybe we won’t. but i’m done with this. the market is insane up there, and all of the prices are far too inflated for this to even be a safe investment. there aren’t any jobs up there, so i don’t even know why so many people are buying houses and the market is this crazy. i can understand some places being like this, where land is completely built up and there’s nothing available, but this is just ridiculous.

i wish we’d never started this. i hate that place already and i don’t even live there yet.