i had my first belly dance class last night. i loved it!! i’m very awkward, but i loved it. i’m hoping, with enough practice, i can be in the urban isis troupe someday. my back and shoulders hurt today, but my abs didn’t hurt as much as i thought they would. probably because i was doing it wrong. but i lasted the whole hour without wussing out, so that’s good. to improve my stamina, i’ve started (kind of) running. after dinner, brumby and i went for a run up and down the street. because i have to start somewhere. i hear if you keep doing it, you can go farther each time. i was actually able to run a little farther than i thought possible. but anyway. class was fun, and i’ll definitely be going back.
yesterday’s defeat (re: alito filibuster) has inspired me to create a new website based on activism. i want it to be a community site, so i’m toying with drupal. i literally just started on it, so it’ll be a while, coz i’ve never used drupal before, and have no idea what the hell i’m doing. but when it’s finished, i’m hoping it’ll be a good resource for people who want to do something but don’t know what to do or where to start. people all over the country can post about local protest events, or national boycotts. maybe. it depends on what the platform is capable of, i guess.
i am never, ever volunteering for anything ever again. unless it sounds like something i’d really like to do. and then, if i stop liking it, i will quit. period. of course, in this case, i was volunteered for the position in such a way that if i’d turned it down, i would’ve looked like a stupid jerk. (i’m sure i posted about it, but to refresh your memory: someone asked if, since i was an english major, i wouldn’t mind helping the church by writing things from time to time. i said sure. then, later, i was asked to go to a meeting, and when i got there, i was told i was chair of communications for the stewardship committee. and given a rather lengthy list of tasks. at the time, i didn’t have a job, so i figured i’d give it a shot. besides which, i had no idea that i was going to be volunteered for something like that, so i was caught off guard. since “volunteering” i have received almost no cooperation. no one ever gets back to me about anything, i never have any idea what to do, and no one ever has anything enlightening to tell me at the meetings. so i’ve spent most of my tenure on the committee, frustrated and embarrassed. so now we’re caught up.)
anyway, i finally got just about all the information i needed to complete the brochure by last friday. so i spent friday working on it, calling the printer, etc. i neglected one of my school assignments to do this. tonight, i get an email saying that more work needs to be done on the layout, and can i come in for a couple of hours in the next couple of days to work on it? no. no, i bloody well can’t. i’ve put so much time and effort into this stupid thing, and nothing i do with it is ever right. i’m there at every freaking meeting. i wait forever til it’s my turn. i ask everyone for input on whatever project i’m working on. i get vague, unhelpful advice, then am told that we’ll get back to it some other time. so i plug along as best i can. i send updates to the chairman for him to look over and advise me on, so i can keep working from there. i never got any feedback at all on one of the projects, which has been looming over my head for months now, and still isn’t finished. (it’s been sitting there, while i wait to hear what i’m supposed to do with it next. even though i’ve emailed it out twice and asked for help in person multiple times.)
and i’m really angry. i worked very hard on that brochure. i didn’t know how to use publisher at all when i started on it, so i had to take the time to teach myself. then, since i haven’t used excel in years, i had to re-learn that, too, to make the graphs look halfway decent. i took into account all the scant advice i was given in regards to how everyone wanted it done, and still managed to make it look, for the most part, like it hadn’t been done by committee. i did the best i could with what i had, and it still isn’t good enough. i can see why both co-chairs quit. one of them never showed up to any of the meetings, and the other one showed up to every single meeting, only to be nitpicked to death. (her official reason for resigning was a family issue, but i’m pretty sure she’s probably glad to be rid of this job.)
i have no problem volunteering my time. (though every bloody thing i’ve volunteered for this year, i’ve ended up doing some of the most boring, moronic tasks. like separating and folding grocery bags for the book sale.) it’s not like i expect a lot of thanks or attention. i give my time because i like to help others. but in the case of this committee, it seems like way more stress than it’s worth. no one wants to help me get my jobs done on time, and i can’t be expected to do it all myself. i was constantly told something would be ready by a certain time, and it never was. so i’d be anxiously awaiting it, while deadlines passed, panicking because absolutely nothing was getting done. i’ve spent time that i needed to be focusing on stuff like schoolwork, trying to see to it that the projects were going somewhere. (like all the time surrounding finals week last semester, and then when i was trying to get the house ready for guests, etc.) well, this is the last straw. i asked and asked for the information before last week, and was told every time that it would be sent to me right away, and of course never got it. each time that i went as far as i could with what i had, and sent a draft, it was either ignored or there was something new to fix, which i did. i just don’t have time for this anymore, and, at this point, i have no real inclination to help. it’s too stressful and i have enough going on in my life as it is. it’s all going to be crap anyway, and since i’m going to be blamed for it no matter what at this point, i’m just not going to put forth a ton of stress and energy to put out a mediocre product. maybe it was supposed to be fun, but i don’t think it’s a lot of fun to see deadlines whizz by while i’m waiting on something and continually begging for attention to be paid to the things i send. if i had any cooperation whatsoever, i probably really would’ve enjoyed this opportunity. as it is, i didn’t.
there is nothing about this brochure project that hasn’t been annoying. i spent the entirety of my time at work trying to finish it today, only to find out that there were a few things wrong with it, right before i left. and i don’t have publisher at home, so i can’t work on it. so i decide to call the printers to see if i should just leave it as-is or wait til monday, when i can fix it. it seemed pretty simple. i wanted to ask: 1) how much for 250 brochures? 2) 500? 3) when is the latest i can get the brochure to them, and have it back by the 9th? because if i could give it to them on monday or tuesday and get it back before the deadline, i’d just fix it on monday. if it had to be there before monday afternoon, i’d just leave it. well, just asking how much for 250 brochures took far, far too long. but it’s all i managed to ask before he got my number and told me he’d call me back. this was nearly two hours ago, and i still haven’t heard from him. if it takes this long to figure out how much it’ll cost for 250 brochures, i’m not looking forward to having to ask for a quote for 500, or, worse, how long the job will take. bloody hell. it would be so much easier to just order the damn things online, but the church wants to establish a rapport with the local printer or something, so now i have to deal with this guy that’s either deaf or stupid, and isn’t capable of giving me a simple quote. i’m kind of hoping he’s too expensive or it’ll take too long, so i can use one of the cheap, fast websites i found. in about two minutes, i managed to find a site that would do everything i want, 500 brochures for under $500, delivered in four days. call me crazy, but i’m betting this guy is going to take a lot longer than four days. and while goofing around with this all day, i’ve been neglecting my schoolwork.
i’ll be so glad when this project is over.
but at least the goldfish commercial makes me smile.
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